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Baby Medical Q&A, Issue #089 Watch Your Language
March 01, 2014

Welcome to another edition of Baby Medical Q&A News.

Watch Your Language

This month's ezine is called "Watch Your Language" because how we speak to our children and our loved ones is so important to your child's development.

Children are like sponges. You know that, right. They can learn so much. They can learn another language as if it's nothing. They learn to go from a few words at one year to conversations at three years. The brain is just soaking up information. It's amazing.

But the brain is just soaking up at this young age. There are no filters. There is no gate that only lets 'good' informatiion in. There is no rationale so the child cannot distinguish what is said in anger or frustration, like 'you are so lazy' to the truth, like 'the world is round'.

It's as if everything is truth to the young child's brain.

Imagine your child if he or she grew up thinking that they could do anything, that they were talented and that they could achieve great things. Imagine if they believed that they would always succeed, that the glass was always at least half full, that there were no limits for them. Imagine how confident they would be.

Do you see children like this everyday? Is this the norm for your child's peers. If it isn't, it's because sometime between infancy and how old they are now, they have been given 'truths' that limit them, most likely inadvertently.

You might think that your child was never going to be this person, but if that's the case you are forgetting that baby at age 12 months (plus or minus a couple of months) who took the first step, fell down, but kept getting up and trying again and again and again. That baby was so confident and assured that he or she would walk. That confidence will still be there if there have been no lmiting beliefs instilled.

It's just not what you say to your child, but how you talk about them to other people. Are you embarrassed sometimes by your child? - what message do you think you are giving when that happens - most likely that he or she is not ok somehow.

For children to be confident, they need to feel ok about who they are.

So, beware comments that may give your child a limiting 'truth'. Here are some examples of how they may look:

  • apologising for your child being too loud
  • telling your child she is too clumsy
  • telling your child he is lazy
  • saying things like 'we are no good at that in our family'
  • telling your child he is always late
  • saying to someone, 'my child can't do that'

You could try these instead:
  • I love my child's exuberance
  • keep practising and you'll get better
  • you can do it
  • you can do anything you want if you set your mind to it
  • my child is finding this a challenge but I have confidence in him

Great Resources

I have just finished reading a great book that explains the science behind this. It's a great book and I highly recommend it.
'The Honeymoon Effect' by Bruce Lipton - click here

Bruce also wrote another great book, called 'The Biology of Belief' - click here.

And my all time favorite for how to interact with your child is 'The Child Whisperer' by Carol Tuttle - click here

Please feel free to share this ezine with family and friends.

Till next time,

Dr Maud

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